Post by lace on Nov 5, 2006 21:45:18 GMT -5
[glow=red,2,300]My Turn: Domestic violence: A men's problem [/glow]
Published: Sunday, November 5, 2006
By Mark Redmond The brutal murder of UVM student Michelle Gardner-Quinn is understandably the main topic of conversation among so many of us here in V
This line of discussion inevitably leads to a conversation about the need for women to safeguard themselves even more diligently than they have. To never walk alone in town. To keep with the group. To always keep their cell phones charged. Essentially, to live in fear.
What is rarely discussed is what the batterer's intervention specialists here at Spectrum term The Elephant in the Room, that elephant being: Why are so many men in this country targeting, attacking and killing women?
New York Times columnist Bob Herbert makes this very point in a much-e-mailed piece he wrote on Oct. 16 titled "Why Aren't We Shocked?" He points to the recent killing of a female public high school student by an adult male in Colorado, and then the Amish schoolhouse slaughter in Pennsylvania. In both incidents, Herbert notes that the male perpetrator separated the males from the females, and then deliberately attacked only the latter. "In the widespread coverage that followed these crimes, very little was made of the fact that only girls were targeted," he writes, calling each "a hate crime."
Jackson Katz, author of the book "The Macho Paradox: Why Some Men Hurt Women and How All Men Can Help," makes the same point in an Oct. 11 article: "Once again we see that as a society we seem constitutionally unable, or unwilling, to acknowledge a simple but disturbing fact: These shootings are an extreme manifestation of one of contemporary American society's biggest problems -- the ongoing crisis of men's violence against women."
It is hard to disagree with these two writers. Women are under siege in this country, and Vermont is no exception. In 2005 the advocates at Vermont's Network Against Domestic and Sexual Violence programs responded to 14,964 hot-line calls. From 1994 to 2005 there were 73 domestic-violence fatalities in Vermont, and 84 percent of the perpetrators were male. But instead of asking, "Why are so many men making these choices?" the focus is on, "How can women better protect themselves?"
I am not saying we should not address the latter, and in fact the advice I offer my wife, the women I work with and the female youths at Spectrum is to do everything they can to maintain their personal safety. But as a society we are woefully neglectful in coming to terms with the fact that this is first and foremost a male problem, perpetuated by men, and men have to take responsibility for it.
Herbert points to gangsta rap, video games in which points are earned for molesting and killing women, Academy-Award winning songs like "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp," and the booming business of Internet pornography, all of which result in "the disrespectful, degrading, contemptuous treatment of women (which) is so pervasive and so mainstream." I think he is completely on target, and I would add to that mix World Wrestling Entertainment, a highly misogynistic and offensive-to-women performance that takes place right here in Burlington every year in Memorial Auditorium, a facility owned by we the people.
Until we look at these things, and begin to grasp that violence against women is a men's issue, we will only be waiting for the next tragedy to occur, whether in an Amish schoolhouse or on Main Street in Burlington.
Mark Redmond is executive director of Spectrum Youth and Family Services in Burlington
www.burlingtonfreepress.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20061105/OPINION/611050324/1006/NEWS05
Published: Sunday, November 5, 2006
By Mark Redmond The brutal murder of UVM student Michelle Gardner-Quinn is understandably the main topic of conversation among so many of us here in V
This line of discussion inevitably leads to a conversation about the need for women to safeguard themselves even more diligently than they have. To never walk alone in town. To keep with the group. To always keep their cell phones charged. Essentially, to live in fear.
What is rarely discussed is what the batterer's intervention specialists here at Spectrum term The Elephant in the Room, that elephant being: Why are so many men in this country targeting, attacking and killing women?
New York Times columnist Bob Herbert makes this very point in a much-e-mailed piece he wrote on Oct. 16 titled "Why Aren't We Shocked?" He points to the recent killing of a female public high school student by an adult male in Colorado, and then the Amish schoolhouse slaughter in Pennsylvania. In both incidents, Herbert notes that the male perpetrator separated the males from the females, and then deliberately attacked only the latter. "In the widespread coverage that followed these crimes, very little was made of the fact that only girls were targeted," he writes, calling each "a hate crime."
Jackson Katz, author of the book "The Macho Paradox: Why Some Men Hurt Women and How All Men Can Help," makes the same point in an Oct. 11 article: "Once again we see that as a society we seem constitutionally unable, or unwilling, to acknowledge a simple but disturbing fact: These shootings are an extreme manifestation of one of contemporary American society's biggest problems -- the ongoing crisis of men's violence against women."
It is hard to disagree with these two writers. Women are under siege in this country, and Vermont is no exception. In 2005 the advocates at Vermont's Network Against Domestic and Sexual Violence programs responded to 14,964 hot-line calls. From 1994 to 2005 there were 73 domestic-violence fatalities in Vermont, and 84 percent of the perpetrators were male. But instead of asking, "Why are so many men making these choices?" the focus is on, "How can women better protect themselves?"
I am not saying we should not address the latter, and in fact the advice I offer my wife, the women I work with and the female youths at Spectrum is to do everything they can to maintain their personal safety. But as a society we are woefully neglectful in coming to terms with the fact that this is first and foremost a male problem, perpetuated by men, and men have to take responsibility for it.
Herbert points to gangsta rap, video games in which points are earned for molesting and killing women, Academy-Award winning songs like "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp," and the booming business of Internet pornography, all of which result in "the disrespectful, degrading, contemptuous treatment of women (which) is so pervasive and so mainstream." I think he is completely on target, and I would add to that mix World Wrestling Entertainment, a highly misogynistic and offensive-to-women performance that takes place right here in Burlington every year in Memorial Auditorium, a facility owned by we the people.
Until we look at these things, and begin to grasp that violence against women is a men's issue, we will only be waiting for the next tragedy to occur, whether in an Amish schoolhouse or on Main Street in Burlington.
Mark Redmond is executive director of Spectrum Youth and Family Services in Burlington
www.burlingtonfreepress.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20061105/OPINION/611050324/1006/NEWS05