Why didn't I see the signs ????

[lese30]

Well .. It seems my own child has been the victim now and I am wondering why I didn't see the signs?
I went through this myself ! And when I had my daughters I swore I would never allow them to be hurt as I was . Well, last week end My youngest daughter informed me that someone that my ex step father has been "touching" her since she as 5 years old and let me remind you she is now 12 !!!! I was so furious at myself and at him .. my first instinct was to go and blow him head off!!!! but I didn't ! I went to the police and I am now more enraged then I ever was !! WHY??? because they have not arrested him yet.. in hinesight there may be other victims, and may be one now!!!!!!!!
and he is going on vacation .. and they act like they aren't concerned .... I am .. WhY should he get to .. when daughter ...isn't smiling and having fun she is suffering

PLease excuse my anger .. but why didn't I see the signs???

[lace]

:'(Do not feel Guilt. It is not your fault. REMEMBER THAT. I understand how you are right now on a nightmare roller coaster and I am so sorry. Hold on and take little steps one at a time. The Law enforcement let us down when CSA came crashing into my family. Get your ducks (evidence) in a row > LE is no better than the proof we provide them. Those sign are hard to see or believe I know I have been there. Get the child in therapy because law enforcement never seem to believe the parents. Please stay on this site with me but also please go to www.network54.com/Forum/6443/ Parental concerns for child sexual abuse. I am Lace there also and we have a bunch of good people to help and give support. You have every right to your feeling of anger .. I am angry with you .. But you are not to blame. Beat my self up for a long time for not seeing the signs my self. But now you have disclosure and you and your child can go up from here to healing. I hope this perp gets his just dues.I send a bunch of love and concern to you. You are not alone. I understand. Email me ( my addie in your inbox) I am here for you. Sit still for a bit and feel this warm hug I am sending. I am so very sorry.

[lese30]

I was so angry yesterday when I posted that I couldn't even finish my thoughts ! Thank you for replying to me .. your words helped me realize I am not alone in this fight !
Sometime ago I started a petition for tracking devices for sex offenders. At that time I was a victim as a child and the pain wasn't as raw and new as when I was a child. Today .. I think my outlook is different.
I almost feel like a tracking device is to kind. I feel like a sex offence against a child or in cases of rape ect. should be treated like that of murder.
This action takes ones life and rips it to pieces!!!
As a mother of a 12 year old girl who just went through this NO punishment is stiff enough in my eyes. As a good ol adult american .. With a realistic view on this horrible crime, I feel as if NOTHING will ever protect another child or person from this hurt ! so let's toughen the laws .. why wouldn't a sex offence carry the same sentences as murder or homicide? A sex offender in prison for life or close to is a sex offender who can never hurt again ! THey are NOT on the streets and they are NOT playing near or with our children .
I am in savior mode .. to save my child and all the other's who may have ever been hurt by this evil monster . To save all the children who in the future may get hurt by him as well.
I am thinking inside the box .. Not anything unreal .. unheard of or out of the ordinary ! If our states can pass the 3 strikes your out laws and put people in prison on minor offences for LIFE with that law .. then let's imagine .. our children NEVER having to run into their predator 's on the street ever again .. as children or adults!
My rage is so clear and defined I know what I must do ... I must make sure this never happens to anyone else again !

THe things this man has done to my daughter are sick .. the things he said to her are even sicker ! and I truely feel that my state will let us down . ALready the county detectives haven't set my daughters interview up . Already they haven't returned my calls. and All ready I am becoming an angery mom with a voice and WILL BE HEARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Any one who has any idea's as to how to get the laws in my state and other's change for the penalties to become as stiff as homicide or murder .. please send me your feed back > I would love to lobby my state to have laws set in motion so NO sex offender walks out those prison doors!!

p.s your hugs were so much needed and greatly appreciated!!!

[lace]

Correct you are not alone. I am here any time you need me. What state are you in? Lets check the laws in that state. I hope we find it is one with new the new harsher laws against sex offenders. Every day a convicted offender is lock up a child some where is safer. The problem is we have harsher laws now in some states but the investigation is lacking. Law Enforcement do not listen or put our case on the back burner. Good you are now in a mad fighting mode > only way to get any things done. I moved to fast should of got a camera and became a detective my self. We found no justice as happen to often. We had physical proof and still could not get the perp off the street. My first response was this has to stop NOW, I will kill the SOB. I found therapist documentation held more water than my words. Get your daughter to a therapist as soon as you can. They also come in all sizes > some good some bad. I know where you are at and beside the anger there is deep heart break. The worst pain in the world one can feel. Yes, to me it is the same as muderr it kills a spirt and tears a life in to shreads > so hard to repair. It is not fair .. Hold on it can get better even through that is hard to believe. My CSA child is 20 now an has never recovered completely. I am angry every day and fight CSA in any any avenue I can find. Stay with me and together we will fight!

More hugs sent because I know you need them. You hurt so bad and I wish it was not so.

[lace]

I do so hope you are ok. I am praying for you and your daughter. Wish I could do more but I am here for you any time I can help. Be strong, hold on and I see you are a fighter. Now it is time to fight and not let this injustice get notice and something be done to stop it. One hurt child to me is one to many and I carry a deep fighting spirit to do what ever I can to prevent or stop any child being abused. It makes me so angry, these crimes are the most horrid to me in our society. We must fight and have our voices known to protect our children and their innocence. Yes, get the offenders and predators off our streets (they are terrorist on our home land). You take gently of your self > you are in my heart and thoughts.